I am still in a state of semi-shock and am completely unsure now what to do. Here is the background:
He is now a 9 year old male, neutered Beagle who we got from rescue a little over 2 years ago. It took him a long time to make an attachment, but eventually he really latched on to me. So, for quite awhile we have shared a close bond, with no hint of any problem with our bond.
At the same time, I was doing a lot of training work with him. While I had not been indoctrinated into the Sit-Stay techniques per se, I was essentially doing almost of the things recommended. He became a pack member and seemed to have a very clear place in our family group. We try to stick to the same daily routine as much as possible, and it has always been apparent that he really thrives the more we stick to the "routine."
There have been periods where my wife and I have gone away on trips, occasionally up to 3 weeks. And I am away from the house about 3 days a week for about 4-5 hours at a time. But he is only rarely left by himself for any significant amount of time. He has never complained or appeared upset when left. However, when either one of us comes home, he gets very, very excited and sometimes stays overly-stimulated for awhile.
Well, a couple of weeks ago, I ended up being away from the house from early morning to almost midnight for 4 days in a row. And after these absences were done, I began to notice a change in him. He continued to follow me around the house, as he has done for a long time now, even if my wife is also home. And he would greet me just as excited as ever and start barking. And he would engage in extensive face licking.
So at first I didn't really notice, but he began avoiding any other contact with me. For instance, he is only allowed on the couch when one of us is there and we give him permission. After dinner I do some work in my office and then come in and lie down on the couch. And he would always want to come up and lie down beside me. He goes to sleep very early and would often fall asleep on the couch for hours.
He had never ever been one to hold any kind of a grudge, so my wife and I were really thrown for a loop as he kept up this avoidance (of me only, not her). I became extremely upset and worried, as well as confused as to what was going on. Because he never could hold any type of hard feelings, I was not at all convinced that it had anything to do with my being away.
But now I think so. This went on for over a week until it broke the other night. I was doing some routine care when I accidentally hurt him very slightly and I tried to say I was sorry but he didn't want to hear it. Finally, I just broke down from the upset and distress of the past week and just started crying and sobbing. He just gave me that "what's wrong, don't feel bad look." Then he fell into my arms and licked my face.
But then the next day, I had to leave the house on one of my regularly scheduled days, for about 5 hours. And when I came home, he was stand-offish once again. But I was home in time to take him on his walk and he was fine after that.
But now I am scared and not sure what to do. My wife and I are scheduled to go away for a few days, starting tomorrow. We have a sitter who comes over and stays with him while we are away. But I am not sure I want to go right now. I know we have to live our lives, but recent events have both of us on edge. The thought of going through another week, or more, of all this is almost unbearable.
My wife will fully support whatever I want to do about the upcoming trip, including canceling the whole thing, as well as any other interventions we need to make. But I just feel unsure what to do.
Thanks for listening and also thanks in advance for any feedback.
